British Friday - Betty White edition

via Jezebel

I'll stick with my Chucks for now, thanks.

I think these might have been what Steve Martin had in mind when he spoke of ... The Cruel Shoes.

The screams were incredible ...

Painfully High Fashion: 6 Insane Women’s Boots & Shoes | Dornob

A Stitch in Time - Toujours Couture

Balenciaga’s black tissue-paper taffeta dress, ballooning sash, and velvet coat

from Vogue, October 1, 1951.

by Horst/courtesy of Condé Nast Archives

Paris fashion week just closed, which seems a fine time to give another look at this recent Vanity Fair article. I've always thought of haute couture as fantastic, costume-y extravaganzas that aren't meant to be worn off the run way. But as Amy Fine Collins writes, by law:

... an haute couturier is a designer who presides over the creation of hand-finished made-to-order clothing, in a “laboratory” that employs at least 20 workers in Paris. The haute couturier must present a minimum of 25 ensembles twice a year, in January and July, and construct a garment over the course of several fittings, directly on a client’s body or on a dress form replicating her physique.

When time travel is perfected, I'm making a beeline for Givenchy, circa 1957.

It's an entertaining piece that traces the history and changing face of the Paris houses from Worth to Gaultier, Lacroix, and the Kaiser today.

Christian Lacroix for Jean Patou

hand-painted toile de jouy cocktail dress, 1987

By Francois Hallard/courtesy of Condé Nast Archives

Amy Fine Collins on Haute Couture | vanityfair.com

You can never have too many hats, bags, or shoes

Add this to my list of museums I absolutely MUST visit!

Amsterdam's Museum of Handbags and Purses is a rare place. It offers an historical survey of Western bags and related accessories from pill boxes to luggage. On view are some 400 objects from a collection almost ten times that size. Most of the material was acquired by Hendrijke and Heinz Ivo, a married couple who began collecting in earnest 25 years ago, after he retired at 51 (he was president of the food division at Mars).

Sigrid Ivo, an art historian and daughter of the museum's founders, directs the foundation that now owns the collection and runs the museum. But this is no mere mom and pop affair. Here, in a very glamorous setting, the matter of handbags is taken seriously, stylishly and with a light touch. The museum occupies a double-fronted 17th-century house on the city’s grandest canal, the Herengracht. Exhibits are displayed in chic, modern glass cases and lit as if each handbag or lipstick case was a jewel. A great many are.

Tassen Museum Hendrikje Museum of Bags and Purses

IN THE BAG | More Intelligent Life

British Friday, Part of the Second: Swing Low Sweet Posh

British Friday, Part of the Second: Posh and Becks edition

British Friday - Bow down bitches edition

New York, May 6. Image via Getty

Monday morning moment of Zen: Cha-cha heels edition

Chiwetel Ejiofor should totally be the new Doctor, imho.

British Friday - I only care about soccer if Becks is playing edition

British Friday - You Best Step Off My Girl Edition

My love for the Posh is well documented.  And now, word is that the Beckhams are planning to leave the U.S. and return to Europe.  Not quite two years after signing with the LA Galaxy, negotiations are underway for Becks to join AC Milan.  

According to this Reuters article (via Yahoo!News), their departure is being greeted with a general yawn by the rest of Hollywood.

Household names in Britain and the rest of Europe, the Beckhams struggled to translate their appeal to star-heavy Los Angeles.  Victoria Beckham's passion for high heels and tight black dresses were at odds with LA's laid-back flip flops and sweatpants.

Bonnie Fuller, former editor of Us Weekly, said she loved Posh, 34, and her style, but felt the average American did not relate to the former "Spice Girls" singer.

"She didn't have enough hair," Fuller said of Victoria's Beckham's short mane, which she cropped further last year.

"American women are big hair girls. They want celebrities with long, sexy hair which they can aspire to. Posh is also superglam most days, all day, and American women relate much more to Jennifer Aniston or Angelina Jolie's uniform of jeans, T-shirts and sexy little sweaters."

You know what Bonnie Fuller?  You need to step the fuck off.  Seriously, I'm taking my earrings off.  I am not playing with you.

First of all?  Don't get me started on the hair thing.  Are you high?  

Secondly, I personally don't want my stars to be Just Like Us.  I adore that Posh is completely over the top, and ultra glam (although she rocks the boyfriend jeans too), and is totally a character living out her own inner screenplay.   I don't want to relate to her.  I want to live vicariously through her absurd life and imagined conversations with Karl Lagerfeld.  I want to look at red carpet pho-toes of her and think, "Oh Posh.  You've done it again, you little minx".

Not, "She's wearing her dress backwards.  That's original.  I used to do that in high school."

I also love that she has both a sense of humour and self awareness.  She knows that her job is to be Victoria Beckham.  As she told Harpers Bazaar:

If I go to the supermarket looking like shit, that affects my work. I am selling an image.

Gods damn right!

So farewell Posh.  Float above the haters because they just don't matter.  You are MAH-JAH!

BUZZUH??!

WTF SJP?? Seriously?

I just can't even deal with these.  I think I need to go have a lie down ...

And the cycle of life continues - SMILE WITH YOUR EYES!

Jezebel - You Wanna Be On Top: ANTM Cycle 12 Girls Revealed!


With the exception of one, maybe two of the girls, looks like Cycle 12 is going to be a big steaming pile of *meh*.

Mind you, I'm still going to watch.  

UPDATE!

Jezebel also checked in to see how some of the hamsters from past seasons cycles are doing.

Jezebel - America's Next Top Models : Where Are They Now?

They didn't include Toccara Jones, who definitely has to rate as the most successful former ANTM'er.

Two words.

Italian Vogue, baby.  Italian Vogue.

You were always my favorite

Tatjana Patitz, the forgotten supermodel | Life and style | The Guardian

Catching up with one of the faces of the 80's who wasn't Naomi, Linda, Christy, or Cindy.












I always liked you best, Tatjana.

You can't live in this, either

Several months ago I started subscribing to Vogue. I was thinking that maybe I was at a point in my life where I needed to refine my look a little.  

Its a fun flip-through.  And I view it more as a source of inspiration and translation than actual aspiration.

Because I do not aspire to ever own a hand bag that costs 10 grand.  A bag like the Calle by Loewe. 

The hell?  Now, this is a gorgeous bag.  No question.  But I guarantee you that I can find a bag that looks exactly like this one from a vendor in front of a metro station, and pay less than 50 bucks for it.

Who in gods name would pay 10 thousand dollars for a purse?

Oh.  right.  Well, that's okay.  It is Posh after all.

It's British Friday! It's British Friday!

I'm so glad Miss B. reminded me what day it is.

And disabused me of the notion that a Scotch egg is a pickled bit of horribleness. It isn't. You had me at coated in sausage and bread crumbs and deep fried.

Much love to Holly, Pepper, Pippa, Sybil, and Rupert.

TTFN dearies!

Look into pants!

The Fug Girls have been reading US magazine so I don't have to anymore.

Fug Girls: Ten Things We Learned From Celeb Fashion in 2008 -- The Cut: New York Magazine's Fashion Blog

And if we're talking about lessons learned, there is no better teacher than Alexis Morell Carrington Colby Dexter Rowan.

I don't wear my hair for you

Jezebel has been reporting on recent "news" articles decrying the pixie cut trend because, according to the authors, it makes you less attractive to the mens, and you'll never get the sex with short hair, and blahblahblah, you know what?  FUCK YOU.  

Because I rock this look.  

In other news, welcome readers (okay, reader) from New Zealand!!!!  I was delighted to read your comment this morning Ms. Constantine.  A response and follow up will be forthcoming.

Love her!!!!!! Part of the second

Victoria Beckham Cover Story - Interview with Victoria Beckham - Bazaar.com

Love her!!!!!!

I have no idea what's going in this video, but I do know I want desperately to join in their game.  Pick me, Posh!  Pick me!

THE VICTORIA BECKHAM COLLECTION

tip o' the hat to TortieGirl!