Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Supernatural: A Master List of Recaps

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An Introduction : The Road So Far ...

SEASON 3

3x8  A Very Supernatural Christmas : Until then, we'll have to muddle through some how.

SEASON 4

4x1   Lazarus Rising : "I'm the one who gripped you tight and raised you from Perdition."

4x2   Are You There, God?  It's Me, Dean Winchester : The Witnesses have risen, and they're plenty pissed.

4x3   In the Beginning : "No matter what you hear, or what you see, promise me you won't get out of bed."

4x4   Metamorphosis : Ruby 2: Manipulating Sam Boogaloo

4x5   Monster Movie : Oktoberfest!  It's like Dean died and didn't go to Hell.

4x6   Yellow Fever : Eye of the tiger, baby.

4x7   It's the Great Pumpkin, Sam Winchester : ASTRONAUT!

4x8   Wishful Thinking : Oh, Ben Edlund.  You mad scamp.

4x9    I Know What You Did Last Summer : And Dean wishes there was enough brain bleach to be able to forget.

4x10  Heaven and Hell : “How I feel? This, inside me? I wish I couldn’t feel anything, Sammy. I wish I couldn’t feel a damn thing.”

4x11  Family Remains : Meh.  Every season has a weak episode or two.  This is Season 4's.

4x12  Criss Angel Is a Douchebag : It's not a trick, Michael.  It's an illusion.

4x13  After School Special : Dean is making those polyester gym teacher shorts work.

4x14  Sex and Violence : And now Hoyt from True Blood would like you boys to beat each other to death for his pleasure.

4x15  Death Takes a Holiday : Tessa!

4x16  On the Head of a Pin : "Well, I guess I’m not the man either of our Dads wanted me to be."

4x17  It's a Terrible Life : "Are you ready to stand up, and be who you really are?”

4x18  The Monster at the End of This Book : Behold!  The Prophet, Chuck.

4x19  Jump the Shark : Poor Adam.

4x20  The Rapture : It's kind of like being chained to a comet.

4x21  When the Levee Breaks : The demon blood junkie detox experience.

4x22  Lucifer Rising : "He's coming ..."

SEASON 5

5x1   Sympathy for the Devil : Please allow Mark Pellegrino to introduce himself.

5x2   Good God, Y'All : The boys' first break-up - back when it still meant something.

5x3   Free to Be You and Me : Sam tries to take a break from The Life.  The Life comes looking for him.

5x4   The End : THIGH HOLSTER!

5x5   Fallen Idols : The first Supernatural episode to be erased from my head canon.  And Paris Hilton isn't even the worst part.

5x6   I Believe the Children Are Our Future : ”So, some freak is going to come in my room while I’m sleeping and take my tooth. Sounds scary. No thank you.”

5x7   The Curious Case of Dean Winchester : There'll be time enough for counting, when the dealing's done.

5x8   Changing Channels : Reduce your chances of passing it on.

5x9   The Real Ghostbusters : BUNGIE!

5x10  Abandon All Hope... : Oh, Jo.  Oh, Ellen.  *SOB*

5x11  Sam, Interrupted : PUDDING!

5x12  Swap Meat : More like swap this script for one that's not full of plot holes, poor characterization, and missed opportunities, amirite?

5x13  The Song Remains the Same : This is it.  Team Free Will.

5x14  My Bloody Valentine : Tortiegirl is still traumatized by the cold open.

5x15  Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid : Sheriff  Jody Mills is introduced.  Zombie pie for all!

5x16  Dark Side of the Moon : *THUNK*  Samulet, NOOOOOOOOOO!!

5x17  99 Problems : Dean's a vessel and his spirit’s really low. Does he look like a hero sir, I don’t know.

5x18  Point of No Return : I just didn't want to let you down.

5x19  Hammer of the Gods : Gabriel, NOOOOOOOOOO!

5x20  The Devil You Know : Lovers in league against Satan.

5x21  Two Minutes to Midnight : The finest of the horsemen is introduced.  Well helloooooo, Death.

5x22  Swan Song : I let him out.  I gotta put him back in.

SEASON 6

6x1   Exile on Main St. : Sam is back and possums kill.

6x2   Two and a Half Men : YOU GIVE ME THAT BABY, YOU WARTHOG FROM HELL!

6x3   The Third Man : Oh heyyyyyyy, Balthazar.

6x4   Weekend at Bobby's : WHITHER THE GINGER PEACH COBBLER?

6x5   Live Free or Twihard : And then Buffy staked Edward.

6x6   You Can't Handle the Truth : The truth is rarely pure and never simple.

6x7   Family Matters : Sam is a soulless man.

6x8   All Dogs Go to Heaven : What's that boy?  You say Sammy's soul is down the well?

6x9   Clap Your Hands If You Believe... : Nipples?

6x10  Caged Heat : I learned that from the pizza man.

6x11  Appointment in Samarra : Dean plays Death for a day, Tessa returns, and Show remembers that Adam exists.  And now we will never speak of him again.

6x12  Like a Virgin : Stop dragon my heart around.

6x13  Unforgiven : Sammy did a bad, bad thing.

6x14  Mannequin 3: The Reckoning : This time it's personal.

6x15  The French Mistake : It's an alpaca, dumbass.

6x16  ...And Then There Were None : It's like a Khan worm on steroids.

6x17  My Heart Will Go On : Leo DiCaprio was not harmed in the filming of this episode.

6x18  Frontierland : Well, when you’ve done this job as long as I have, a giant from the future with some magic brick doesn’t exactly give you the vapors.

6x19  Mommy Dearest : You know what the Mother of All is most angry about? That now thanks to Dean she can’t get "We Built This City (On Rock and Roll)" out of her head.

6x20  The Man Who Would Be King : “Let me tell you my story. Let me tell you everything.”

6x21  Let It Bleed : Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn

6x22  The Man Who Knew Too Much : KRIPKEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

SEASON 7

7x1   Meet the New Boss : Nothing on earth is his equal— a creature without fear. Welcome to Season 7!

7x2   Hello, Cruel World : I’m sorry, are the voices in my head bothering you?

7x3   The Girl Next Door : She’s a leaf on the wind. Watch how she soars.

7x4   Defending Your Life : No one wants to do it alone.

7x5   Shut Up, Dr. Phil : Hello, salty goodness! The guest casting that caused my heart to grow effulgent.

7x6   Slash Fiction : Sam and Dean should have shotguns for this kind of deal. Shotguns that shoot borax, but still. They should have shotguns.

7x7   The Mentalists : Did you have that roommate in college who would break up with her boyfriend on Friday night only to be back together with him by lunch on Sunday? And it happened every weekend like clockwork until it just became routine and hardly even registered? Yeah.  This episode is kind of like that.

7x8   Season Seven, Time for a Wedding! : Nuke’s scared because his eyelids are jammed and his old man’s here. We need a live… is it a live rooster? We need a live rooster to take the curse off Jose’s glove and nobody seems to know what to get Sam or Becky for their wedding present.

7x9   How to Win Friends and Influence Monsters : Bobby is fine! He and the Russian built a nice little cabin in the Pine Barrens.

7x10  Death's Door : It’s like that scene at the end of Planet of the Apes. All you can do is pound the sand and scream at the heavens because she did it. She finally really did it. SERRRRRRAAAAAAAA!!!!

7x11  Adventures in Babysitting : Nobody leaves this place without singing the blues.

7x12  Time After Time : Was it a stand alone that did little to advance the season arc? Yes. Did it feature Jensen Ackles in a custom suit and fedora? Yes. Does the later excuse any shortcomings of the former? Oh, yes. Yes it does.

7x13  The Slice Girls : ALL OF THE FEELINGS. THE LAST SCENE MADE ME FEEL ALL OF THE FEELINGS.

7x14  Plucky Pennywhistle's Magical Menagerie :  ASKED THE UNIVERSE IF THEY COULD JUST BE BROTHERS AGAIN, AND TA-DAH! THE UNIVERSE LISTENED! ALL OF THE FEELINGS!

7x15  Repo Man : I hold firm to my original assessment that this is the creepiest, scariest, squickiest episode that Show has done in a long time. Well played. Slow clap.

7x16  Out with the Old : You know, there’s enough dancing on the gag reels they could have given us at least one grand jete. Come on, Show. You took Bobby away. YOU COULDN’T DO THIS ONE THING FOR US?

7x17  The Born-Again Identity
7x18  Party On, Garth
7x19  Of Grave Importance
7x20  The Girl with the Dungeons and Dragons Tattoo
7x21  Reading Is Fundamental
7x22  There Will Be Blood
7x23  Survival of the Fittest

SEASON 8

8x1   We Need to Talk About Kevin : “Saving people, hunting things. The family business.” Season 8 restates the mission, Dean is Legend, and Sam’s hair looks good, girl.

8x2   What's Up, Tiger Mommy? : The task of closing the gates of Hell just got a little more complicated. To say nothing of the search for the egg salad recipe.

8x3   Heartache : Sam makes a stand for Team Cake.

8x4   Bitten : The Doctor Who Series 3 episode “Blink” did a brilliant job of telling an emotionally engaging story from an outsiders’ POV using video as a key exposition element with minimal screen time for the series leads. “Bitten” is not “Blink.”

8x5   Blood Brother : Plenty of flashback-y goodness, but all you really need to know is that vampirates is a thing.

8x6   Southern Comfort : Garth steps into Bobby’s shoes and a specter slides into Dean’s psyche.

8x7   A Little Slice of Kevin : Cas is back! Cas is back! Cas is back!

8x8   Hunteri Heroici : It’s Supernatural. What did you expect, a happy ending?

8x9   Citizen Fang : Vampires I get. Roger Workman is crazy.

8x10  Torn and Frayed : Everybody breaks up with everybody and no one is happy. So, you know – Wednesday.

8x11  LARP and the Real Girl : House Winchester raises its banners. KINGS IN THE MIDWEST! KINGS IN THE MIDWEST!

8x12  As Time Goes By : Show adds a pleasantly satisfying new layer of myth and the boys meet their Winchester grandfather. Don’t get too attached.

8x13  Everybody Hates Hitler : Time travel. Nazis. The Impala is bigger on the inside. SuperWho is a thing.

8x14  Trial and Error : The Winchesters are closing the gates of Hell. You’ve probably never heard of it. It’s totally underground.

8x15  Man's Best Friend with Benefits : Brad Buckner and Eugenie Ross-Leming wrote an episode that makes "Route 666" look good. Who knew such a thing was even possible?

8x16  Remember the Titans : It’s okay. After Oliver turned down the ice cream, Sam got him a mechanical owl, and that made everything better.

8x17  Goodbye Stranger : I loved this episode so mu-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-ch.

8x18  Freaks and Geeks : Krissy returns so she and Dean can be adorable together and fools that disrespect Bobby’s memory get served.

8x19  Taxi Driver : The second trial is completed and EVERYONE HUGS! ALL OF THE HUGGING!

8x20  Pac-Man Fever
8x21  The Great Escapist
8x22  Clip Show
8x23  Sacrifice


SEASON 9

9x1   I Think I'm Gonna Like It Here : The angels have fallen, Castiel is human, and Dean makes a deal for Sam. Sounds like Tuesday.

9x2   Devil May Care : Abaddon returns and a new ship sets sail.

9x3   I'm No Angel : “You can’t stay.”

9x4   Slumber Party : Pay no attention to those boys behind the curtain!

9x5   Dog Dean Afternoon : Dean gets his Doctor Doolittle on. It is a delight.

9x6   Heaven Can't Wait : Everyone is trying to get it right with their little taste of humanity.

9x7   Bad Boys : John is why Dean can’t have nice things.

9x8   Rock and a Hard Place : Jody Mills is my everything.

9x9   Holy Terror : You were too precious for this world, Kevin Tran.

9x10  Road Trip :  I will gladly Vote Crowley if he can keep the Winchesters from breaking up every 5th episode.

9x11  First Born : Sam and Cas bond, Dean and Crowley have tea, and Show introduces the greatest bringer of death since Death.

9x12  Sharp Teeth : No. No, sir. You two are going to sit there on that hood until you work things out.

9x13  The Purge : The boys are the most broken that they’ve ever been. Everything is terrible and all of it hurts.

9x14  Captives : This episode. Your emotions are in danger, girl.

9x15  THINMAN : The Ghostfacers are back and I don’t hate them. Is this real life? Is this bizarro world?

9x16  Blade Runners : “Take me to my brother.” So, are we good? You boys friends again? Yeah, I didn’t think so.

9x17  Mother's Little Helper : Nothing unites a family like demons harvesting souls.

9x18  Meta Fiction : Dean in the shower, the return of the Trickster, and great Cas one liners. ALL OF THE FRUIT BASKETS FOR ROBBIE THOMPSON!

9x19  Alex Annie Alexis Ann : Jody Mills lives! Lives to awesome another day and anchor her own spin off IF THE POWERS THAT BE HAVE THE COMMON SENSE OF AN ANT.

9x20  Bloodlines : A perfectly cromulent addition to the TVD/The Originals-verse, but an SPN spin-off it was not.  Let us never speak of it again.

9x21  King of the Damned
9x22  Stairway to Heaven
9x23  Do You Believe in Miracles?

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

I've gotta make these little adjustments

One week from today the fandom will be at SQUEECON-1 for the Supernatural season 8 premiere.

I still haven't adjusted to the move from Friday to Wednesday.


Saturday, September 15, 2012

Sweetie, let's just have some bolly and a bitch through Vogue

Wendy Felton at glossed over undertook the formidable task of reading Vogue's September issue cover-to-cover in one go for her sixth annual Vogue live blog.  It's well worth a read and far more delightful, charming, and entertaining than the magazine issue itself.

It is in this spirit that it seemed an opportune time to recycle revisit my own sizing up of the 2009 September behemoth:

Girl, you better werq!  Fashion Week (originally posted September 11, 2009)


I cancelled my Vogue subscription a while ago, but they keep sending me magazines.  I recently received the September issue, and while thinner than last year's, it's still not something you want to drop on anything wee or delicate.  Let's take a look at the issue, and how it measures up to various things in my apartment ...


It's   definitely smaller than a 14 oz. box of Cheerios.  Also, it will not help you lower your cholesterol.




Advantage: Cheerios











It takes 2 seasons of Supernatural on DVD to stack up to the September Vogue; however, Jensen Ackles may be prettier than Charlize Theron.



Advantage: Supernatural






You need almost three copies of Frank Herbert's Dune series to equal one Vogue.    You might think Vogue has the edge here, but I'll actually read the Dune books more than once.



Advantage: Dune   





Vogue is almost as large as the cast iron ebelskiever pan, and certainly as heavy.  But if you pour batter onto Vogue and place it on a gas stove, all you will succeed in doing is burning the kitchen down.

Sadly, while Vogue may offer 584 stylish steals and smart splurges, it will not offer me delicious pancake balls.


Advantage: ebelskiever pan

Sorry Vogue.   Better luck next year.

Monday, July 30, 2012

Spam Musubi Push up Pop

I tried spam musubi during the great Real LOST Experience of aught'09.  Seemed like the thing to do.  All the other Island delicacies I'd sampled had been quite tasty.  To put it politely, I found spam musubi to be an acquired taste.



To put it bluntly, that shite is naaaaasty.  So I don't know what perverse impulse led JustJenn to create these ...

This is not the delicious orange sherbert
you are looking for

Trust me, the delivery system is not going to improve this wad of ham, seaweed, and rice in any way.

JustJenn's spam musubi push up pops via Laughing Squid


Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Ooh, shiny! A million pieces of light


This has been sitting in the drafts queue for months, but given wax|wendy's mission statement, it's a post that's timeless ... and whose time has come.


All That Glitters: The History of Shiny Things from Etsy on Vimeo.

Via The Mary Sue

Monday, July 23, 2012

My Little Kaiser

I've posted about artist Mari Kasurinen's fantastic sculptures in the past, and we can now add another entry to my ERMAHGERD MUST HAVE list.  Behold!  The Kaiser!


I imagine Mr. Lagerfeld approves.  Tip o'the hat to Rich!

"I am the king and you are riding in a carriage of regret."credit: Jacques Brinon/AP and Pascal Le Segretain/Getty
Previously on wax|wendy: My little pony, my little pony