It's British Friday! It's British Friday!

Helen Mirren trumps Harry Potter.  Helen Mirren trumps all.  Helen Mirren, sexiest woman alive.

Photographed by Perou for Esquire Magazine

In praise of parasols

Shiny!

While their methodology is suspect at best, the Weather Channel is not far wrong in naming D.C. one of the sixth hottest cities in the United States.

You don't have to tell me.  There's nothing like standing at the bus stop in the morning, hoping that salty tears and humid air will be enough to keep my flesh from bursting into flames.



But if there's one thing I learned from two winters in Chicago, it's that dignity and fashion have no place in extreme weather.  I finally took a page from my friend Irene, and embraced the parasol.  It's made all the difference.  Our great-great grandmothers so had it right.

Heat index of 102 you say?  Pshaw.

Easy like a Sunday morning

Still feeling awkward at the idea of popping open your umbrella when there's not a cloud in the sky?  It's okay.  You just need to start small and work up to it.

You can have my Oxford Comma

credit: Dona Nobis Pacem

when you pry it out of my cold, dead, and decomposing hands.

Although it seems that rumors of its demise have been exaggerated.  As Linda Holmes at NPR explains,

... there was a rumbling that the University of Oxford was dumping its own comma. As it turned out, this wasn't the case.  They haven't changed their authoritative style guide, but they've changed their internal PR department procedures that they use for press releases. The PR department and the editorial department are two different things, so this doesn't necessarily mean much of anything, except that it's maybe a little embarrassing to have the PR department of the university with which you're affiliated abandon your style guide.

You know who's really excited by this news?  Stephanie Meyer.  By Reasoning with Vampires' count, she's never met a comma she didn't like.

source

source

via bookshelves of doom

#Musicmonday: Missy Elliott "Work It" and "Get Ur Freak On"

From one Ptown girl to another, be well Missy!





The Amplified, Missy Elliott has been M.I.A. for a very good reason

It's British Friday! It's British Friday!

It's no secret that we love us some Jason Statham here at wax|wendy.  Naturally I was delighted last night when @tortiegirl advised me that he has a new movie coming out.  My first thought though when I read Killer Elite: Statham Vs. Owen was, "Owen Wilson? What? Why?"

Then I clickied on the linkie.

Not Owen Wilson.

Clive Owen.  *GASP!*


Shit just got real.

The Stathe is an action god, and Clive Owen has some surprising chops.  If you've seen Shoot 'em Up (and why haven't you?) you know what I'm talking about.

Also, two words: pleasuring Monica Bellucci while fighting ninjas at the same time.

From what I can gather from the trailer, the movie is basically The Stathe and Clive Owen beating holy hell out of each other for two hours. Robert De Niro and Mr. Eko from LOST are there too. Yes please!

As the BuzzFeed so eloquently put it, we all win!

Happy Bloomsday!

…I was a Flower of the mountain yes when I put the rose in my hair like the Andalusian girls used or shall I wear a red yes and how he kissed me under the Moorish wall and I thought well as well him as another and then I asked him with my eyes to ask again yes and then he asked me would I yes to say yes my mountain flower and first I put my arms around him yes and drew him down to me so he could feel my breasts all perfume yes and his heart was going like mad and yes I said yes I will Yes.


via Contrariwise

Bittersweet

I'd been at the magazine for five years before my name made it into the masthead.   May 2009.   My Dad carefully cut out the page - and every masthead page that came after - and saved them.

This month, I got my first byline.

I like to think wherever he is, Dad is adding an extra page to his scrapbook.

Check out the full "The Moment" here.

It's British Friday! Royal Wedding edition!

I got up at dawn to watch Charles and Diana's wedding.  I even watched Fergie and Andrew's wedding.  So believe I was up at 5:00 am in my formal jammies, hat, and gloves ready for Wills and Kate.
 
LET'S DO THIS!

From the Virginia Philippy vintage millinery collection.

Speaking of Fergie, though not invited, she was there in spirit ...

What.  The.  HELL?  Did Beatrice rip a piece of plasterwork off a palace wall??

I went with PBS's feed of BBC America's coverage.  The US networks' yammering anchors would have made me go Elvis on my TV.   Based on @TubularTV's feed, Barbara Walters was drunk and in rare form.  Thanks for taking that hit for me, T.   The Beeb kept the blather to a 10 minute discussion of what exact shade of blue Mrs. Middleton was wearing.

It's blue.

There was no debate about what color the Queen was wearing.

Contents of the Queen's purse: lozenges, kleenex, keys to palace, 75 effing carat diamond

 Also, awkward ... Immediately after the ceremony, the Archbishop was executed. 

I only noticed two questionable elitist comments, either one of which would have caused TortieGirl's head to explode had she been watching.  There was the obligatory reference to a commoner marrying into royalty ... as though being the daughter of self-made millionaires is common.  The second was when Kate and her father pulled up the Abbey.  The observation was made that the son of an airline pilot must be so proud that his daughter was about to become a princess.  Because following in the family footsteps of hard work and entrepreneurship  would have been such a disappointment.

*end rant*

Ooh, look!  PRETTY!!

Waitie Katie my arse.  SUCK IT, BITCHES!

I wasn't immediately wowed by her gown, but as soon as someone on twitter compared it to Fraulein Maria's dress from The Sound of Music, I was in love.

I wonder if Wills and Kate will honeymoon in the Alps?

I also got a distinct Princess Margaret vibe from Kate's dress, and I've also seen lots of comparison's to Princess Grace.  Basically designer Sarah Burton for Alexander McQueen knocked it out, and Kate wore the hell out it.

William didn't turn around until Kate got to him, which tradition?  Who knows.  Harry did though, and apparently said, "Wait until you see her."

How much do we love Harry?

In the royal equivalent of the kids' table

Not as much as I love 3-year-old bridesmaid Grace Van Cutsem

Bloody hell it's two hours past my nap and I'm still waiting for the footman to bring me my juice box.  Will you lot just SHUT UP!

MAZEL TOV!

Toon Tuesday - Home Movies "Mortgages And Marbles"

DON'T BUT MARBLES IN YOUR NOSE - PUT THEM IN THERE!

British Friday - National Library Week edition

As a general rule, librarians are a kick in the pants socially, often full of good humor, progressive, and naturally, well read.  They tend to be generalists who know so much about so many things that they are quite the opposite of the boring old poops they have been made out to be. Most of them are full of life, some even full of the devil.

-- Bill Hall, editorial page editor, Lewiston (Idaho) Tribune, Sept. 9, 2001.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY REV. AL GREEN

credit: Kansas City Pitch

He'll never be untrue.



Preach it Rev.

National Library Week - Conan the Librarian

National Library Week - "Party Girl"

".. one of the hidden masters of the world — a librarian. They control information. Don't ever piss one off." - Spider Robinson, The Callahan Touch

National Library Week - Doctor Who "Silence in the Library"

The Library.  So big it doesn't need a name.  Just a great big 'The'.

Etsy buy of the week: Octopus Ring

How much do I love this ring?

I purchased it from etsy seller Ayansi, but she has since closed her shop.  She can now be found at ArtFire, and has a bridal store on etsy - crystaldust - but unfortunately both seem to be cephalopod free.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BILLY DEE WILLIAMS

According to imdb, he originally auditioned for the role of Han Solo.   I don't know if the franchise could have withstood cool of that magnitude.

Not that Billy Dee needs any help.  For the rest of you mere mortal men, there's Lando.  Welcome to the cool side of the pillow.

Via Glark

Waterproof mascara my ass!

I don't know what this is from, but I kind of want to make it my new avatar ...

via where i pause

It's British Friday! It's British Friday!

Inspired by a very silly comment I received that seemed to imply that Brit Pop star Robbie Williams is, in fact, a robot.

Right up your kilt!

Happy St. Patrick's Day amateurs!

POW! POW! Take that robots!

via Reddit

Come on scientists! Are you trying to accelerate the singularity?   I don't think I would stand much of a chance with Watson, but based on these results, I can hold my own when rock-paper-scissors becomes the coin of the robot-realm.

Computers mimic human reasoning by building on simple rules and statistical averages. Test your strategy against the computer in this rock-paper-scissors game illustrating basic artificial intelligence. Choose from two different modes: novice, where the computer learns to play from scratch, and veteran, where the computer pits over 200,000 rounds of previous experience against you.

I opened with scissors, on general principle.



Although I do think in addition to novice and veteran there should be a Sheldon level of game play.



Rock-Paper-Scissors: You vs. the Computer - NYTimes.com via Laughing Squid